I have a desktop PC which double boots #Debian Sid and #Ubuntu 22.04. In Debian I use #Xfce4. In Ubuntu, #Gnome. I executed free -h after a cold boot on both, and, surprise! Gnome uses *less* RAM than Xfce4 (see screenshots). No cheating: Gnome is more modular than most people think, so you can mix and match stuff, making the system lighter or heavier depending on that. And yep, it could be even lighter... Just by removing the snap runtime, for example. ;)
When it comes to customizing my system & DE, GNOME has always been a big hang-up.
@golemwire I am really a fan of KISS/UNIX philosophy and I have, say, very built from the ground up Arch and Void installations, so yeah, tinkered they are. ;) But when I need a machine to work with and fast, I can just throw Ubuntu LTS with Gnome on it: everything I need is already on repos or you can easily get from upstream, and all just works, mostly. :) With time dwm may come, but even on dwm the Gnome backup is nice to have. :)
@golemwire That sounds fair, customization may not be Gnome's strongest point, at least from a user perspective (Budgie, POP OS or the Zorin or Ubuntu desktops are -or were- built on top of Gnome, and are pretty different from "vanilla" Gnome). Personally I like the default UI and workflow, so I don't use plugins nor change appearance or anything, "it just works" as it is so I just launch my work environment and do my coding or whatever stuff, and Gnome stays out of the way. :D