Like the latest fashion,
Like a spreading disease,
Devs will login all the way to production,
Getting root shells with the greatest of ease.

Pentests staked out your whole network locale,
And if they pop your Jenkins then it's all over pal.
If one dev exploit gets a shell in Linux,
They're gonna bash it up, slash it up, hack it up, prod's not up.

Hey! Pager's calling after me?
Prod is out.
You gotta keep 'em separated.
Hey! Hackers disrespecting me?
Take 'em out.
You gotta keep 'em separated.
Hey, they don't pay no mind,
If they're from a different country won't be doing any time.
Hey, come out and play.

Show thread

By the time you hear the pager,
It's already too late,
Some untested code pushed to Ruby on Rails,
One server's wasted and your uptime's a waste.
It goes down the same as the thousands before,
No one is getting smarter,
No one's learning the score.
The neverending spree of hacks and simple mistakes
Is gonna tie your own rope tie your own rope tie your own.

Show thread

Hey! Hackers disrespecting me?
Take 'em out.
You gotta keep 'em separated.
Hey! Pager's calling after me?
Prod is out.
You gotta keep 'em separated.
Hey, they don't pay no mind,
If they're not on a pager won't be working overtime.
Hey, come out and play.

@kyle
You should definitely record an album 🤩

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